The Return of eLf ideas

ideas of an eLven being in Canada

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

New dreams for old

October 18, 2006

Last weekend, Saturday and Sunday, I worked double shifts at Riverview Health Centre, from 730 a.m. to 11:45 p.m. Working my ass off, hey? Well, you can say that. But can you blame me? My close friends and those who are privy of my adventures and misadventures here in Canada, since 2003, would understand me somehow.

You see, after three years of having to spend virtually all my days and nights taking care of my belated grandfather, I feel now that I deserve to be free--free as a bird that doesn't have any woe (if there's such a species of bird).

I've been analyzing again myself; like Carl Jung, hey? You can say that again. For the past two months and so of my getting to work again, I've been working so hard. Proving anything? Yes, I want to prove to myself that, wherever I may be, I am good at what I do. I don't want to be mediocre. I always wanted to excel...whatever occupation or preoccuptaion that might be.

But, of course, there are times when I feel like I need a break, when I need a rest.

Like this week--I've been working at A&W since Monday (until tomorrow, Thursday), and I didn't get any shift as a healthcare aide. I just spent some time at the public library after work. I rented DVDs and checked out some new books.

Most of all, I try to find sparks of inspiration from the spiritual energy emanating in the library and from all the diverse students populating the library. And after hours of contemplation, I decided that...

I will finally contact Language Assessment and book an appointment for the English benchmarking examination. I will be needing this in case I study at a university. The highest is 9, and I will attain that! University? Yes, I plan to study again, and playing in my mind is to take a course related to English Literature, Languages, or perhaps Anthropology or Social Psychology. Oh well, I want to realign myself in this area.

But of course, I will also pursue nursing. I will soon go to College of Registered Nurses of Manitoba to learn if I can challenge the nursing examination at once (after self-studying) or if I need to take the six-month refresher course.

Yes, I will go back to school again. I want to prove something, not to others but to myself.

I want to realign myself.

I had a dream...

And I will make this come true.

I will.

Yes, I will.


For now, I'll keep on working hard.


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