Bowties, Bunnytails, and Belly Buttons

(On Dressing Smartly and Appropriately)

by aLfie vera mella

Maingat ka bang manamit? Ibinabagay mo ba sa iyong pupuntahan ang iyong kasuotan?

While I know and I believe that a rapist, a serial murderer-cum-rapist, a pedophile, or any sexual predator ultimately chooses any victim—beautiful or not, naked or clad—still, there are also so-called stimuli and triggers.

While a woman or even a man, for that matter, has the freedom to wear whatever s/he chooses as long as it is something legal in the particular community or place she is going, she has to consider the circumstances. In short, it's not only about freedom dressing; it should be also about smart and conscious dressing (even appropriate dressing).

For example, if you are going to a party and you decide to wear very skimpy attire, then make sure that you go there by car or any personal vehicle—not by tricycle, jeepney, bus, nor even taxicab.

If you are going out and know that your destination is a very public and densely populated place, then dress down, because surely you will be walking amidst people from various walks of life and you will never know if there would be some evil men who could not control their lust and might express it on you.

If you are going out and know that you will be going back home late at night, alone, and the route that you will be taking will be dark and not much peopled, then dress inconspicuously and unattractively.

Of course, there will remain an iota of possibility that you might still encounter a predator who really doesn't care about what you wear but is only in the heated mood to pounce on anyone, but at least you minimize the element of attraction. This is also similar to a defense mechanism called camouflaging or blending in. If you stick out in a crowd or do not blend quietly with the current environment, you are easily seen or exposed too much. So, there is still validity in the idea of dressing appropriately.

Nonetheless, if you are attending a naked party or going to a nudist beach resort, then—for beauty's sake!—don't wear anything—not even a bowtie nor a bunnytail!

Ultimately, everything boils down to the ability to defend oneself and to stand up with what you are wearing. You have the freedom to look your best, sexiest, most attractive, most beautiful, most alluring, or even most head-turning physical appearance but only when the destination and the route are favorable.

But if you are really bold and brave enough, then go ahead, wear your most attractive clothes and appear in your most attractive self the next time you will be coming home or going out walking alone in a very dark and isolated area. Just make sure you're mindful of your surroundings, extra careful, able to defend yourself, and know what to do when someone begins to mistreat you.

Sa Madaling Salita

Bawat babae ay may karapatang maging maganda at kaakit-akit, subalit kailangan din naman nilang maging ligtas at alerto sa delikadong pagkakataon.

Or, in Simple Words

All women deserve to be beautiful and attractive, but women deserve also to be safe in dangerous circumstances.