I Am Not a Person Who

...shouts at children (especially my own children) every time they make a mistake, forget something, fail to follow simple instructions, and don't want to take a bath when I prod them to.

...yells "Moron!" at the driver of the slow vehicle fronting mine.

...associates every single stupidity to Filipinos in general.

...thinks that the Philippines is a place where only ricefields and mango trees and banana plants grow.

...thinks that someone who has committed a simple mistake is stupid.

...thinks that all Filipinos (or other migrants for that matter) who have immigrated here did so because they were living a pathetically impoverished life in the country where they came from.

...thinks that no school in the Philippines can produce intelligent and brilliant graduates.

...gives greater consideration to what others might say than to what s/he really wants in life.

...feels disappointed upon receiving a "cheap" gift or when hasn't received any gift at all.

...thinks that his/her decisions and choices are always the "brilliant" things worth emulating.

...thinks that s/he's the friendliest in the whole world.

...thinks that Americans suck.

...thinks that Canadians are the best.

...always thinks (and always reiterates) that my partner in life is inferior and is lucky to have me.

BUT

despite being a very patient and compassionate eLf, there's still the human in me who can retaliate someday.

aLfie